Bill lay awake as the breakfast cart rattled noisily down the narrow corridor that fronted the row of dark, lonely cells. In awhile, the cute nurse with big ears would make her rounds. The guys in the medical unit had a pool going, putting up the cookie from their lunch sack, as to what hairstyle she’d be wearing that day. It was different each time; pulled back, combed to the side (left or right), pony tail, bun or loose curls.

The pain in his head was relentlessly throbbing, a brain operation has that effect. He’d been hoping for a transplant, but a repair job on the old one was what he was left with. Also, the thwack to the side of the face from Bumperjack Joe’s chrome bumper jack hadn’t fully healed, and he counted seventeen fang marks on his arms and legs from when he stumbled into that snake pit. Bill grunted and shook his head, no wonder he was having the hallucinations and bizarre dreams. Random thoughts swirled in his head like dry leaves in a wind storm. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath; later he’d have to devote some real thinking time to all that. Where the hell is nurse pretty with those Tylenol?

Another grunt, is this how it’s going to be? Is his new existence an endless series of waiting for trays of crap food and aspirin? Eventually dying of boredom or neglect? How had it even come to this? He could have so easily disappeared into any medium-sized or major city and lived a quiet life. Managed on the stolen one-hundred grand for awhile then gotten a job somewhere, maybe met another girl. He was under no obligation to put it on the line for the sister of the guy who car-jacked him. G Lu, thinking back it now seemed odd to see a mostly naked woman driving around in broad daylight topless and toting a gun. Intriguing in a strange way, the way she seemed completely at ease, oblivious to outsiders or what they thought. Pulling a gun like it was the thing to do and the most natural act in the world. Then again, everything had been odd lately. Beginning, when? Since he could remember his whole life had been strange. Surely, this isn’t normal...is it?

Bill supposed that landing in jail was simply just another path he was going to have to travel. Perhaps this was the way things were meant to be. He knew he’d never be able to forgive himself for the death of Elena Chang, nor would he be able to forget. Maybe he willed himself into the present circumstance because he couldn’t face trying to live on pretending there was a normal life to be found. Every woman he looked at reminded him of the one he had, the one who suffered a hauntingly torturous death in the warm Pacific due to his errors. He should never have taken her in the water, he should have been able to save her. Maybe this was where he belonged. Another twenty or forty years and he wouldn’t have to deal with it anymore anyway. Perhaps that was time enough to resolve the inner conflicts and demons. Then again, at the current rate, he might not live out the day.

When Bill was called out to visit and saw it was Jimmy Fingers, he was both dismayed and relieved. Dismayed because the firm not only knew where he was, but they’d dispatched their most ruthless muscle. Relieved because it wasn’t a contact visit. He took a seat behind the safety glass and grabbed the phone. Subconsciously, he balled his hand into a tight fist and kept it under the table. He’d witnessed some of Jimmy’s handiwork, mangled or missing digits were his specialty.

”How ya doin’ Bill?” Jimmy Fingers’ voice was as cold and emotionless as his eyes. Bill was attempting to appear calm, he wasn’t.

”Hey Jimmy...you look good.” He did, expensive suit, nice tan, blood work for the high rollers must be paying well.

”You don’t.” Jimmy was referring to the lacerations, abrasions and scars on Bill’s face, head and arms. ”How ya feelin’?”

”I been better.” An honest answer, they both nodded solemnly. Jimmy got down to business.

”Attempted murder, a missing girlfriend, suspicion in some other stuff... I always took you for a normal guy Bill.”

”Yeah, well...they always try and build up the charges, make em seem worse than they really are. Most of that stuff is just suspicion and speculation, a lot of it’s explainable.” Again the nodding.

”The firm wants their money back Bill. You know I can’t go back empty handed. I’m gonna need the hundred-K.”

Bill squirmed on the uncomfortable wooden bench. The last he’d seen of the hundred-thousand dollars that he’d embezzled from the law firm, it was disappearing in a cloud of dust in a Chevy low-rider. The chances of tracking the car or the money weren’t even on the charts.

”It’s gone Jim, it’s just gone.” No need to even try and explain that he’d paid out the whole sum to save a girl. A girl he didn’t even know. ”I can’t even begin to explain Jim, you wouldn’t be caring anyway.”
Looking into Jimmy Fingers’ dead eyes, Bill realized the experiences of life ennoble some people, but degraded others. In the end, how events affect our thoughts and deeds are our own decision. It’s up to each of us whether we react with divinity or brutality, and out of this attitude, our perception of the world is formed. Jimmy Fingers had obviously made his choices of how he saw things...Bill was still deciding.

”A girl Bill?” Jimmy Fingers enjoyed the surprised expression on Bill’s face. He liked it when he was able to hit a nerve spot-on. Bill wasn’t certain where Jimmy was going with this. He decided to play coy. ”Good guess Jim.”
Jimmy Fingers leaned in close to the glass partition. ”A real looker huh? Yeah you gotta be to win those beauty contests.”
The easy informality and casualness left Bill’s face, he locked on Jimmy’s eyes. There was a cold, malicious gleam there. Bill immediately realized, ”He knows.”

Jimmy Fingers pulled out a stack of photos from his breast pocket and tossed them on the counter. He flipped through for Bill to see. G Lu at the casino, G Lu leaving work, G Lu and Tommy Two-Head at a diner, G Lu entering a motel... inside the motel room.
Bill regained his composure and put on a face much calmer than he felt. He shrugged, ”Who’s that?” Jimmy put the pictures away and cracked a sinister smile.

”Come on Bill, you know me. You know what I’m capable of. You want your pretty girlfriend and your little buddy to have a nice life don’t you? They don’t need guys like you and me around gettin’ in the way. Now, why don’t you tell me what I want to know and we can all be friends again.”

Bill felt Jimmy Fingers’ eyes freeze on his hand as he squeezed the phone with increasing intensity. How the hell did he find Gloria? Jimmy read his thoughts.

”It was the car Bill, I found em through the car. L.V.P.D. ran the registration on your car, it came back to an assistant D.A. in Los Angeles, an Elena Chang. Come to find out, she’s missing. One thing leads to another, who’s the old boyfriend, where’s he work? Boom. Jimmy gets a Vegas vacation. I locate the car at the tow yard, figure it’s a long shot, but what have I got to lose? No money there, but guess what I do find? Your skinny pal camping out in the thing for awhile before he gets on his feet. I tail the guy, just in case he might by chance lead me somewhere...and he does. To the girl. Their conversations are very enlightening. I’m just a fly on the wall.”

Jimmy sat back with a satisfied expression on his face. He was obviously proud of his detective work. He should’ve been, not too many legit private detectives would’ve been able to put all those links together. Bill knew that Jimmy was in with the L.A.D.A.’s office, the Police Department, and the major law firms in L.A. He also knew that he could do just about anything he wanted and get away with it. He had blackmail currency on a lot of very important people and they’d gladly trade with him in order to keep him quiet.

”A hundred-thousand is nothing to the firm Jim. Why they so interested in chasing me down?”

”I dunno Bill, guess they just don’t like to get burnt by a small fish like yourself. Somebody’s got to hang for letting you get into the firm in the first place. Somebody didn’t do a very good background check. Imagine, a homicidal maniac in charge of the finances of a place the likes of that. Gotta hand it to ya Bill, you sure had everyone going.”

”I made a lot of money for that firm Jim. Investments, creative bank account maneuvering. I did my homework, their money multiplied in my care.”

”Hey Bill...I’m on your side. Believe me, if I had my way we’d all get a little bit of the honey, know what I mean? Speaking of which, about your buddy, I think he’s sweet on your girl.”

Bill was still denying, ”I don’t even know her.”

Jimmy shrugged, ”Yeah, well...you paid out a hundred large to save her sweet ass. Now, all I need to know is...how you gonna make this right?”

That was a question Bill had been asking himself for what felt like forever. One bad choice after another had lead to this point. Now he was looking directly into the face of evil. He had thought by ridding himself of the stolen money, by using it to save G Lu, he might somehow have bought himself some redemption. Bought back a piece of his soul. But, unwittingly he’d sucked both her and Tommy Two-Head into peril along with himself. Running from the memory of abuses done to him and the wrongs he’s witnessed or done himself, living life in the shadows and choosing to avoid intellectual and emotional responsibility in any way he could was how Bill had lived his life to this point...he didn’t want it to end the same way.

Maybe he could still set some things right. Maybe it wasn’t too late and perhaps if he took a decided stand to do the right thing, maybe there was hope after all. The eternal curse of the hope of the hopeless. The fourth quarter comeback, getting off the canvas in the twelfth round for the miracle rally. What’s the alternative? Languish passively in jail and allow circumstances dictate fate? Not yet. He wasn’t quite ready to throw in the towel just yet.

Bill took a deep breath and sat up on the hardwood bench straight. He laid his hands flat on the visiting booth counter and looked Jimmy Fingers directly in the eye. ”Get a hold of Miles Hurley, my attorney. Tell him I want a bail hearing.”

”Bail hearing? With all your charges? He better be one hell of an attorney.”

Bill’s new found confidence couldn’t be swayed. ”Oh, he is. He’s one of the best attorneys in the country.”

Jimmy Fingers asked, ”Where can I find him?”

”His office is around the corner from the courthouse, behind the Shell station. It’s a hollowed out mini-van, you can’t miss it.”